We need to verify your financial information
Our records indicate that you are associated with an outstanding financial liability owed to Taxmaster, His Majesty Joseph Carter.
Before further enforcement action can be taken, we must verify your details and confirm your availability for a mandatory financial reconciliation exercise.
Following verification, you will receive confirmation of:
- Your outstanding balance
- Payment schedule
- Travel arrangements
- Enforcement activities in a Classified Location (14–17 May)
His Majesty and His Indebted Lords
Please proceed below to confirm your attendance and continue to this Stag Compliance Portal below.
His Majesty and His Indebted Lords
You must confirm your attendance with HM Revenue & Carter at the Intoxication Office.
By confirming your attendance through this portal, you acknowledge your participation in the Joseph Carter Fiscal Settlement Operation (14–17 May).
Check what you owe
Outstanding balance
Outstanding Amount: £443.64
Please ensure that all payments in arrears are settled before departure on 14 May.
Participants with unresolved balances may be subject to additional enforcement measures during the stag operation.
Uniform Requirements
Uniform Requirement
To comply with the theme of this operation — School Reunion / Nostalgia — all participants are required to attend in official uniform.
Your assigned school uniform will have been delivered to you via post.
Please arrive at the airport on 14 May wearing your issued uniform.
Non-compliance may result in disciplinary action, additional financial penalties, or forced round purchasing.
FAQ
What is this regarding?
This relates to an outstanding financial liability owed to His Majesty Joseph Carter, now entering the final stages of enforcement.
Is attendance mandatory?
Yes. Attendance has been classified as legally unavoidable under the Stag Enforcement Act (2026).
Failure to attend may result in penalties including public shaming, forfeiture of drinks, or permanent classification as “boring”.
What happens if I don’t pay my outstanding balance?
Unpaid balances may result in:
- Additional financial penalties
- Mandatory round purchasing
- Escalation to the Department of Relentless Mockery
Why am I being asked to wear a school uniform?
This is part of the HMRC Nostalgia Rehabilitation Scheme.
It has been determined that returning individuals to their least responsible state (circa age 16) increases compliance and overall morale.
Do I have to participate in all activities?
Yes. All listed activities are mandatory corrective measures.
This includes Bubble Football, Go-Karting (within legal alcohol limits), and football attendance, as well as additional undisclosed operations.
What are the alcohol regulations?
Alcohol consumption is permitted throughout the programme, except where it may result in immediate danger or disqualification (e.g. Go-Karting).
Outside of these restrictions, participants are expected to operate within acceptable levels of poor judgement.
Why is the location confidential?
The destination remains classified to prevent premature awareness by His Majesty Joseph Carter.
Any individual found leaking information will be subject to immediate penalties.
What evidence do I need to provide?
You are required to submit photographic proof of previous beverage-related interactions with other attendees. Any material you provide will be included in the “Joe Files”.
This ensures all participants meet the minimum friendship threshold.
Can I bring additional luggage?
A 10KG bag has been allocated per participant.
Additional baggage may be approved upon request, subject to financial review and ridicule.
Will there be a schedule?
Yes. A full operational schedule will be issued closer to departure.
This will include activities, reservations, and controlled chaos windows.
What should I budget for?
Typical costs include:
- Pints: ~£3.80
- Club entry: ~£15
- Meals: £8.50–£38
HMRC recommends budgeting for unexpected financial and moral consequences.
Who do I contact for support?
Please contact the relevant department:
complianceoffice@hmrevenueandcarter.co.uk
or
wankeredoffice@hmrevenueandcarter.co.uk
Response times may vary depending on current drinking levels.
What happens after the stag?
Following successful completion of the programme, all liabilities will be considered temporarily settled.
His Majesty will then proceed to marriage.
Completing our checks
HMRC & Carter additionally require documentary proof that all participants have previously engaged in recognised social drinking activity together.
Acceptable evidence includes, but is not limited to:
- Photographs from past nights out
- Group drinking sessions
- Questionable late-night decisions captured on camera
Please submit supporting evidence via the QR code below.
All evidence will be held on record as part of the Official Stag Audit Archive.
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